The previous run of generally silly and incoherent posts has been for a reason. Partially out of a desire to appease you folk, while still putting forth as little effort as possible. Writing real posts like these is more laborsome than it might seem, however necessary it may be. Especially when you honestly don't know what day it is, and you can't remember your best friend's phone number.

Life, on the whole, is not great. For the past week, I have had some kind of ADHD syndrome, I can't concentrate at all. The past two nights have been of the worst kind. I would find something to do or talk about that takes a long time (usually very important, but still not a good time to do), leading me to distract myself until the midnight to 1:00 AM hours, at which point I realized I had a three-page memoir to write, the full documentation for my CS program left to do, two tests to study for, math homework, and at least six pages of physics problems to do. After getting next to nothing done Sunday night, despite being up till 6:00 AM, I stayed home, and repeated this process again, but this time giving in at 4:30 after merely finishing the memoir, and nothing else.

By the time I passed out at 4:30, I was thinking, "Lord, I'm toast, do something!". To my delirious surprise, I was greeted with a series of miracles that I didn't actually expect. One of the problems with staying home Monday was that I also missed a day in my second-period engineering class, in which we were reverse-engineering parts. I was at the point where I was modeling it in CAD, but due to some really complex features, I was getting nowhere. Mr. Briegle had actually sat down and finished the entire part for me. I walk into Physics class, dreading this cumulative test we were about to have (which, by every report I've heard, is by far the hardest test ever made). I hadn't done the homework the night before, so there was absolutely no way I could win this one. I did the 'concerned student' thing and asked her what I had missed the day before, and before I knew it, she was letting me skip the test to study, and I could take it Monday. She wasn't particularly pleased in doing so, and if I don't manage to make her very happy, I don't know what will happen. I was, however, greeted with an unexpected setback in CS. My grace days for the overdue project were used up - I did not know she counted weekends, so I figured I could hand it in Monday as well. Turns out, if I don't drive the printed project over to her house, handing it in on Monday will fetch me a negative 30 point late bonus. My dad will be entirely unpleased with doing this, and he is not happy as is.

Despite this minor miracles, I feel very much on edge, especially with a lot of teachers and such. My work ethic has crashed. My report card came back with a 2.67 GPA (the lowest I've ever had), and although there was nothing below a C, everything hovered in the plain B range. I don't know what it's going to take to put the desire back in making consistent quality work, but I've gotta get it back somehow. School incites nothing more than sadness at the disapproval of the teachers I respect, instead of a desire to go and do well (technically "to go and do well" should be "learn", but high school isn't very "learning" filled). I generally just feel off balance, like I haven't had nearly enough sleep.

In conclusion, I would really love to get an Xbox 360, enough so that I may attempt to get a real job. Speaking of which, I sent in my resignation to Mr. Semi-famous old guy, but he wasn't very responsive about it. I'll work for him once again tomorrow, and that should be about it. As for other work, I'm not entirely sure what to do. I've checked with Ian (Sho's dad, the engineer, for those who don't recall) a number of weeks ago when I was killing myself with work, at which point he suggested I wait until my schedule was free to plan on anything. If I can ever get these grades on track, working like 4-8 hours a week over there would be great. We'll see in the next few weeks.

For now, I should sleep. I've heard that being awake for 21 hours makes one mildly intoxicated, and with a little less than 2 and a half hours of sleep, that should make me well nigh drunk, comparitively. I sure hope Thanksgiving dinner is good.