After dumping forty hours of my skilled-ass labor into America's economy, I realized that my dignity comes at a higher price than a retail store has to offer. I'm flipping Office Depot the bird, as it were, and saying NO to shit like planograms and rewards cards. Quotas just aren't my thing.

You've probably never seen a planogram - it's just a diagram for where crap goes in the store, and they get updated based on the whim of some executive with ADD. I have never felt more useless in my life when I spent thirty minutes moving shredder lubricant from one side of the store to the other. It's a glorified version of running in circles.

It also feels (morally) wrong to encourage people to spend money on stuff they don't need. It feels brainwashing to go through powerpoint after powerpoint of training exercises so that I can complete quizlets to show I understand what Office Depot is about. Nothing disgusts me more than corporate blather. Sure, they have a purpose; they want their employees to feel alright about who they're working for, they want to make sure everyone's on the same page.

Besides, I just don't work Sundays. I'm not sure where along the line I figured I would be okay with sacrificing that.